you mean uncle robert

1. i am writing a fake elmore leonard novel. i have trace amounts of good intentions on this, just so everyone can sleep easier/without a knife under their mattress
2. i need something to eat besides toast
3. can i have some of that orange juice
4. why did sam rockwell just impersonate kevin millar in hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy: also, the main guy from The Office: get a new thing. it’s not that exasperating, whatever is happening to you. also, The Office: you’re not actually entertainment.

My goal here was to provide some kind of content other than just the picture of a NASCAR-themed goat below; I think I can comfortably say I’m about to fail in that pursuit.

Reader survey
Which of the following topics are most interesting to you?
1. Surveillance photos of hipster haircuts and accompanying diagrams, and some unrelated diagrams
2. Surveillance photos of Bruce (cat) sleeping, or more surveillance photos of young people at the bunch where you have to try and figure out whether or not the target is a hipster but you can’t because they’re not wearing enough clothing to make superficial judgments
3. Guerilla real estate journalism (just getting a credit check everyday from a different landlord and seeing how quickly they say no)
4. Lists of things I ate or drank
5. MP3s of me singing along to grateful dead songs

I was supposed to do dishes today, i was also planning on writing more of my fake elmore leonard novel, or any of my fake elmore leonard novel (i have a beginning, where the person who is going to get murdered has a hard day at work, and then like another three pages of the police guy complaining about his wife)

also, tomorrow, 8 juillet AD 2005, 5pm to end of time, 1443 w. winona, the backyard, come and display your fealty to the PTB-Whet matrix of univeral truth. there will be high-ABV russian beer, emo foodstuffs, and my dramatic interpretation of the rayhad jackson scene from boogie nights.