it’s not the smoking, steve, it’s the crapness

i am very proud to inform you that this website is the No 1 google result for “pay you to fuck that bear.” for everyone who has been with us here at dodongo enterprises since our founding in 1993 should take a moment to think about what a total idiot you are.

look at this monkey

i can tell you this:
The Man Who Wasn’t There: pretty good
My new green shirt: pretty good
Rain: pretty good, especially when it prevents the children from playing high school sports

in the future:
if you are someone who has been known to enjoy me and beer, and you are not moacir or whet, you should come to the cove tomorrow night?

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